Mama Genius Zone: Divine Downloads

This is a forever kind of thing.  The genius zone.  It was encoded and divinely designed into your DNA.  More on that below.  Afather a vulnerability vent.

I’ve been riding the hot mess express lately.  And I have a seat for you, because I know you ride it too. Listen- I’ll hot mess express it everyday with you. Listening without making you feel crazy or that it’s not a big deal. It’s okay for it not to be ok. You don’t have to emotionally regulate for the sake of anyone. You aren’t JUST anything (I’m Just trying to get through to the weekend, I’m just tired from not sleeping last night, I’m just between jobs, I’m just waiting for xyz…).  Disqualifying yourself as such is a former speech pattern, minimization strategy and disempowering dialect you no longer speak.

I feel compelled to write to you about this- to offer this.  I’ve struggled with my own disempowering language, “I just need to get back home to Maui and my space to feel inspired to write, I just need to force myself to get back into a groove and consistent presence with Mama Mindset, I just need to “find more time.”

Mamas.

I’m coming live from the keyboard in Central Florida- in Winter Park, FL where I grew up.  The Spanish moss lazily draped on the cypress trees framing the lake beyond.  The summer days spent jumping off the dock, the heavy thunder and brilliant lightning flashes of the afternoon thunderstorms rolling in.  That smell of fresh earth and the cool breeze as the rains approach.  It’ll always be part of me and is always centering to reconnect here.  I think this is the longest in my life I’ve ever been away from the humidity and heat of the Sunshine State.

We came to help prepare my parent’s house for their return from spinal cord rehabilitation and their injuries sustained from the day they survived their small plane crash.  Being here waves of gratitude have intermittently hit that I get to help prepare their home for their return and sitting with that is full of weight and wonder.

And then I dropped into the capacity of creativity that exists for me wherever I am.  A neutrality of energy that serves me and that comes from the place in my heart and soul that knows and claims this is the way I’m meant to show up for you, for Mamas everywhere.  In the mess of it all. In the chaos of it all.  Even when there is no routine and things seem spiraling at times.  Crammed into the same bed with warm bodies and sharp kicks at night. It’s deliciously cuddly and uh endlessly entertaining in an interrupted sleep sort of fashion.  But I do secretly love it- making forts in hotel rooms and having this time all together.  With my wide pony Mom bun perched atop my head on repeat in the mornings. I know I’ll look back upon this chapter and be proud that we showed up energetically.  That we stayed in the hard with them and we moved our energy for them in a meaningful way.  We illustrated to our babies how important it is to hold space for others in times of crisis and transition and to get creative in the process.

Cruz turned 2 a few weekends ago here!  My SONshine boy with the characteristic dimple on the R side- with his easy to smile and laugh and a demolition with a sparkle of mischief in his eye will fly home no longer a lap infant.  I had to recently purchase him his first ticket since we moved our flights back to be here longer.  

Camden turned 5 last week- the girl who made me a Mama!  She’s a fierce female, her imagination in full bloom.  So it’s no wonder we went celestial unicorn cake (thanks Publix) with “unicorn dust” sprinkles bursting from inside for her birthday.  I blew up 1000+ plus (felt like) balloons from balloon arches from Amazon prime since their birthdays weren’t at home and we had made our own fun celebrating them just the 4 of us. 

With all the traveling and transient nature of the past 2 months, really and truly, I haven’t been taking great care of myself.  Writing and creating new works of art has slowed.  And I’ve missed it.  I’m in full recalibration mode now, re-calculating my route.  Because I get to choose if I will invest time and hold space for myself to express my inner artist.

And I know you feel this too.

I know this door and invitation into creating and cultivating this space and ongoing art exhibit into the most miraculous forms of art in the Mama Mind has been divinely dropped into me that I may be vulnerable with you as we travel through life together.

Sporadic sleep patterns, inconsistently moving my body, relaxing our plant-based diet to experience all the mainland things has been fun and thrilling at times, but also depleting.  We’ve built amazing new memories with friends that are family to us and invested time in people we love and hadn’t seen for so long.  Staying up late for life chats fills my soul and cultivating the connection of lifelong friendships that endure across the thousands of miles we live apart.

In the midst of traveling and new sleep patterns for Camden + Cruz, we’ve been going with the flow.  And with that flow, I’ve immersed myself into all the tasks at hand and the fluidity of this chapter.  I haven’t prioritized speaking my own love languages into my life with dedicated time to write and journal, to move my body through yoga and intentional movement- getting that glorious sweat on which isn’t difficult in the all encompassing heat and humidity here.  There has been lots of swimming though!  Getting wet and refreshed almost every day all together has been so rejuvenating.  Dips in the cold San Diego Pacific, endless trips around the lazy river at our hotel in Phoenix while seeing my mother in love Lola, plunging into our dear friend’s pool in North Atlanta with the pine trees peering on, and lake days here in Florida have been a constant.  I remember growing up this way living in my bathing suits all summer.

And remembering that all bodies are bikini bodies.  That our babies crave to make those memories with us — and that our inner child and artist longs to create those memories as well.  I have noted a lot of inner dialogue and turmoil around my body these past few weeks.  And I’m so grateful I’m aware of the judgment and how it impacts me.  And that I can choose to pivot into a place of peace and compassion for how my body shows up for me and what I can do to nourish it.

But I still have to tell myself almost everyday that I’m enough.  That I’m worthy.  That holding onto the dreams divinely dropped into me, boldly pursuing them and keeping them held in reverent focus is not only possible for me despite the circumstances of life and travel and transition… that it is essential for me to live into the space available for me to thrive.

This space is where we are greeted by that restlessness stirring in our soul.  The nudge to create over consume.  The devotion to ourselves as a beacon of self love and compassion that compels us to create.

Gay Hendricks introduced the concepts of Zone of Excellence and Zone of Genius in his work of art called The Big Leap.  The exploration of how these percolate and land in our lives fascinates me.  Many people live in their Zone of Excellence.  And as the name suggests, this is a place of Excellence.  An abundance of great accomplishments result from this place.  It’s good and productive.  It’s a place that illustrates mastery of concepts and proficiency.  It’s an incredible place that provides positive feedback and oftentimes comfortable societal acceptance of that which you are doing and pursuing.  Here, you build your success around preconceived ideas, parameters, and definition of success largely determined by outside factors and well defined constructs.  It is in many ways playing by the rules already set up by other people.  I’ve been here many years of my life.  And passed crazy hard college fitness tests, played pro soccer, passed medical boards and accomplished lots of brilliant moments.  And I claim that.  I do.  I really have landed in a field of pride around all that living into my Zone of Excellence allowed for my life.  How I bloomed.  How I grew where I was planted. 

The zone of excellence is a space where we can also thrive.  There is nothing wrong with the zone of excellence.  Many people live here their entire lives, and they contribute wonderful things to the world.  What I’m here to offer you is to make a conscious choice where you spend your life.  Do it mindfully and reverently.

Taking the leap into your Zone of Genius requires bravery and compassionate courage.  It’s living into the place that is uniquely yours. Something in me wanted to float on the breeze more.  To flow in my own directions.  To explore off script more.

Here, in your genius zone you lean into your innate genius- those natural abilities you have rather than those you learned and accrued in school and formal settings.    You are endlessly inspired here tapping into your passions and your ability to excel far exceeds anything you could “force” or “convince” yourself of in a traditional setting where you’re playing by the rules.  Here, you’re coloring outside the lines creating your own art that you love.  Just for you.

So here I am to personally deliver the invitation to myself and to you.  An invitation to step into your genius zone.  A sometimes not so subtle spiritual siren which guides you in the way you were meant to prosper.  Growing in this direction is not easy or even comfortable.  It requires bravery, courage and an unwavering commitment to yourself and what makes your soul soar.

In my own life, I came to a pivotal point/fork in the road where I knew and felt for that staying and working in clinical medicine in the capacity of a Pediatrician would have offered me a brilliant career path and the opportunity to continue to impact the lives of many thousands of children and their families.  It is my zone of excellence.  I trained, studied, worked, hustled and persevered through thousands of hours in the hospital halls and years of medical school to arrive here.  And yet, in my soul I know my inner artist was meant to take the passion which compelled me to choose to pursue clinical medicine and to paint my own version of being a Healer- to pay attention to the way I connected empathically with Mamas in the hospital and clinical setting, to the capacity I already demonstrated in my personal life to show up in the sacred moments for Mamas…. and to build upon that.   To have the courage to acknowledge it takes incredible bravery to pursue your dreams and sometimes even more massive bravery to walk away from them and with Elsa “into the unknown” when they aren’t serving you anymore.

You are capable of creating the life of your dreams.  Right now.  Your mindset will determine your ability to prosper in the expectant and postpartum period.  You were born to thrive.  You were born to step into your genius zone and all the ways you uniquely enhance this world.  You were not born to minimize, mute, silence, belittle or disempower yourself in pursuit of that which brings you joy.

Keeping the commitments you make to yourself is the most important component of your life.  Choosing not to disappoint yourself or make concessions which take you further from the internal compass of your own truth is your path forward.  Your natural boundaries speak love over yourself and your life and are your currency to peace.  Releasing all limiting beliefs around what you feel you “should” be doing…. comparing yourself, shaming yourself, or guilting yourself into things are all vibrations which are lower than that which you were designed to live in and around.

Cultivating awareness of your emotions is essential.  Believing that all of your emotions are here to serve you, to further you, to teach you, to guide you.  That none of them are shameful or too scary to process or admit or claim.  They are all a part of you and to deny them is to deny a part of you.  You are a sovereign being with a unique constellation of emotions and not only allowing them, but addressing them and asking of each of them what they have for you is an invitation to move forward and deeper into understanding yourself, loving yourself, accepting yourself unconditionally and thriving.  This is your genius zone.

Living into your genius zone means questioning everything.  Are the things you’re doing currently serving your best interest?  Are you protecting your energy or are you giving your power away in various interactions, obligations, conversations, commitments you’ve made that don’t propel you toward the way you know, YOU KNOW you were meant to shine?

The choice is yours.  And claiming ownership over your power, your choice, how your time is spent is empowering and healthy.  Spend time choosing whether you will embrace your zone of excellence or your zone of genius . No wavering.  Make a commitment for you.  Whatever feels most aligned with your core values at this time is the right path for you.  It isn’t looking at the other lanes at what others are doing.  It’s staying in your own yoga poses, mindfully looking around and taking inventory of your own life to determine what aligns with your core values.  And cultivating contentment and pride in doing what is best for you, in what serves you, in what sustains your spirit and creates an oasis in your life for you to live into the expansive space your soul craves.

You were born for this.  You were reborn for this.  As a Mama. The power you wield is incredible.  The creativity you possess is magnificent.  The impact you’re meant to have is profound.  There is no right time.  Your time is the present.  It is safe for you to rise now.

Will you step into your genius zone?!  Will you embrace the desires and passions you keep tucked away in the dreaming corner of your mind because they are so precious to you?  You may judge them or feel that you’re not worthy of them. You worry that if you speak them aloud they might sound silly or preposterous.  You feel that you “should wait” until a better time in your life or when your children are older or that it’s not the right time to prioritize yourself.  EVERY Mama has held or currently holds one or more of the above limiting beliefs.  Can you release them?!  Because they aren’t true.  You have everything it takes to pivot from overwhelm and stress to peace and prosperity in your life RIGHT NOW.  And this is what I desire for you.  And what I know you desire for yourself.

Choose today to drop into your genius zone, or your zone of excellence.  I’m here holding space for you to do what serves you at this point in your life.

Text yourself the ✨emoji right now to yourself to depict you are dropping into your divine appointment with your genius zone right now.  For you.  You’re holding space for yourself. For you. 

You can text me too if you want.  Seriously.  I’m committed to seeing you in your glorious genius zone.  808.354.2690.  I’ll respond with sparkles of seeing you recently step up for yourself.  I’ll mirror it back.

Aloha, Mama.